Friday 20 July 2012

Friday poem

I don't usually do this. But I have been so very taken with Hera Lindsay Bird's The most beautiful love poem of all time this year that I can't help but share.

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The most beautiful love poem of all time The most beautiful love poem of all time starts like this. The most beautiful love poem of all time has no entrance and no exit. The most beautiful love poem of all time has won many awards and commendations. The most beautiful love poem of all time goes; All I want is to be followed around by a brass band, so that everyone is constantly aware my presence. The most beautiful love poem of all time should be read fast.

The most beautiful love poem of all time is looking for a subject. The most beautiful love poem of all time has a recurring motif of clouds. The most beautiful love poem of all time is teaching you how to become the kind of person that when lost in the mountains, would prompt a search party. The most beautiful love poem of all time feels like a hand moving steadily up your thigh.

The most beautiful love poem of all time is like shaking hands with the world. The most beautiful love poem of all time is like introducing basketball to the moon. The most beautiful love poem of all time is like a really awesome burrito. The most beautiful love poem of all time says all the things you are unable to, like ‘I want to have sex with you,’ or ‘come back or I’ll punch your stupid face.’ The most beautiful love poem of all time is what the wind feels like to running dogs. The most beautiful love poem of all time takes you to your first school disco, and tries to feel you up in the cloakroom. The most beautiful love poem of all time is about as subtle as a brick to the head.

The most beautiful love poem of all time is going through your drawers and pretending to use your deodorant. The most beautiful love poem of all time is actually kind of creepy. The most beautiful love poem of all time tells you that you should have more calcium to improve your overall bone density. The most beautiful love poem of all time is a face reflected in the helmet of an astronaut.

The most beautiful love poem of all time is telling you that this time, things will be different. The most beautiful love poem of all time is not telling you the whole story. The most beautiful love poem of all time is a beautiful girl rowing a boat over a beautiful lake. The most beautiful love poem of all time is full of talking animals and the animals say ‘hey, how’s it going?’ The most beautiful love poem of all time isn’t actually all that much about love.

The most beautiful love poem of all time winds down the window of its car and yells something dirty at you out the window. The most beautiful love poem of all time is a place of burying. The most beautiful love poem of all time could be worse. The most beautiful love poem of all time is on fire, and all the animals are in danger, except for the horse in the far paddock, sadly eating the flowers from your hat. The most beautiful love poem of all time is the feeling of looking out the window of a train. The most beautiful love poem of all time painted your face on the back of its eyelids. The most beautiful love poem of all time has a huge boner for you. The most beautiful love poem of all time is either scary or romantic. The most beautiful love poem of all time should be read over and over in a loud chanting voice, until the audience gets tired and leaves.

The most beautiful love poem of all time is thought by some people to be an ironic commentary on the most beautiful love poem of all time, but it’s actually totally sincere. The most beautiful love poem of all time has never felt like this before. The most beautiful love poem of all time is like a giant invisible dog, watching over you while you sleep. The most beautiful love poem of all time is falling around us like the beards of ancient kings.

The most beautiful love poem of all time will defeat you with karate. The most beautiful love poem of all time looks a bit like your mother. The most beautiful love poem of all time says things like ‘hey there!’ and ‘I’m running to your heart, so don’t be afraid now,’ which in any other context would be embarrassing. The most beautiful love poem of all time will grow old and then die. The most beautiful love poem of all time is always getting drunk at parties and playing sad songs on the piano. The most beautiful love poem of all time is a parachute, made of empty gloves sewn together. The most beautiful love poem goes floating down over the fields, like thousands of empty hands.

The most beautiful love poem of all time is what scissors feel like to the hair. The most beautiful love poem of all time is what astronauts feel like to the moon. The most beautiful love poem of all time is what sheep feel like to themselves. The most beautiful love poem of all time put your face between its hands. The most beautiful love poem of all time turned into a sad canoe and paddled away.

Originally published in Turbine 2011

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